My Story is Far from over

When I first began to be diagnosed with illness after illness, my life fell apart and I was slipping into a dark place. I couldn’t understand why all of this was happening to me. I spent my entire life loving God and trying to be a good christian and give back to the world whenever I could. So why was my body attacking me and at such a fast pace. I was terrified and felt so alone. I struggled with depression and anxiety. I felt hopeless.

After these past few years I finally found a strength, I turned to God for my answers. I still do not know why all of this is happening but I know I need to give it my best fight and also help others along the way. Not to say there wont be those low moments but I am gonna give it all I have to keep myself strong and healthy for as long as possible. I am not giving into any of this. I will take it all and use it to share Gods Love and Grace. He did not do this to me, but I know he would want me to help others with what I am learning and going through. I refuse to let this get the best of me….every scar is a reminder of who has carried me this far.

For all my beautiful friends who are struggling, I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers always. I pray you can find your inner strength and hope, to get you through any of your dark days. And for those who are not ill, I pray you find it in your hearts to help others with kindness and words of hope. We are all beautiful, especially when we come together.

I may never be the person I was, but that is ok…..I am not going to allow the shadows to consume me. My life has been so blessed that I cant even begin to count how many blessings and I know the Lord has never left my side. I will walk in the light of Grace and my new journey has just begun. My story is far from over.

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4 thoughts on “My Story is Far from over

  1. hi deborah it sounds as though you are doing somewhat better as you still have the fight in you. i
    on the other hand no long have that fight left in me. been going on way too long and i have lost a lot of friends. i can no longer use social media anymore as it is too depressing with everybody hating each other. i can’t get my self to enjoy that anymore as the stress brings on the pain.
    i have been using CBS oil to help me – it has been a huge help Deborah but i am still not where i would like to be.
    I still have my bird Eliot, but i did give up social media and now i can spend more time with her. She is my life, we are getting old together.
    we have to do the best we can do and accept it as hard as it is.
    stay happy my friend and know you are not alone. I think of you often and do enjoy getting these posts. say hello to anybody and everybody that may remember me
    thank you
    Ellen Schloss

    • My heart is always near to you hun and while I put up a brave face, I have some very low moments still. I am still fighting and praying for miracles. I never thought I would be here in these health conditions at my age. Stress, depression and pain are my three biggest enemies that I fight daily. As each day goes by I know I am ever closer to a point where I will not be able to take care of my birds. That thought breaks my heart even though I know they will be well cared for. Its like giving up my children. I feel like I still have some work to do to help others and our precious feathered ones so I am focusing on that as much as I can before it is too late. I am here for anyone who needs to talk, it is always good to have someone who understands what we are going through and not just lending an ear.

      Prayers and Hugs
      Deborah

  2. Hi Deborah
    I never thought I would ever be in this condition either and it doesn’t get an easier as time goes by. I keep thinking i am not taking enough supplements and vitamins so i buy more. yesterday i bought apple cider vinegar in pill form thinking maybe this is the miracle that i need, but up to about 20 supplements daily. i guess they are working somewhat just hard to tell anymore.
    Do you have help coming in to help with your chores? are you still able to drive?
    I had a nice day yesterday had some help to take me shopping and spent way too much but still it was a good day. for once i remembered everything i needed even down to scotch tape LOL
    supposed to be some protesting going on today – so sad there is so much hatred. Please stay safe my friend

    • I am blessed to have family to help here. I do not drive any longer as I dont feel it is safe. I cannot go out often, due to the pain. If I go out then I pay the price for a couple of days in severe pain. It is nice to get out once in awhile though. I totally understand now how our birds feel living in captivity and not getting out 😦

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